Quarantine Blog - Day 11

“You need to let the little things that would ordinarily bore you suddenly thrill you.” - Andy Warhol

I stared at a rug yesterday for a good hour. I marvelled at it’s intricacies, the neutrality of its colours giving it an ability to just melt into the floor without subverting your eyes to it. In the middle of this rug, there is face of a Furby (a childhood toy). It looks quite psychedelic. The way the rug seems to reverberate out from the centre, it’s no wonder I was entranced. It also got me thinking of something I read about the human brain being wired to find faces in things and the power it has over us (“The Idiot Brain” by Dean Burnett for those who wish to read it). I still to this day see faces in things such as cars, it’s no wonder Disney decided to make a film about it, they could have come up with a better title though, rather than ‘Cars’. But it also goes to show why people see faces of Jesus everywhere, in places like toast, wooden boards, moulded fruit. The idea of seeing a face in something you shouldn’t see a face in would probably lead a few naive minds into thinking they were having a religious experience. However a more intellectual mind, such as myself, sees a Furby. 

Moreover the power of a smile is real and is used in most sales formats, because unconsciously people buy from people or things that smile. Its why Amazon has that weird looking smile arrow underneath its logo, its why most adverts have people smiling even in seemingly mundane scenarios(cough McDonalds Restaurants cough, cough Happy Meals cough). It’s why, as a person who sells over the phone, I was taught to smile while on the phone, because people can apparently hear a smile. But, far from my teachings, I also like to make the wanker sign if they’re telling me to Foxtrot Oscar, because I’m the umpteenth salesperson to sell to them that day. Most the time we’re buying the happiness. Let’s be honest 99% of our purchasing behaviour is not for essential stuff, its for things that we’re told will make us happier because it will either: Make us look good, make us feel good, save us time, reduce our need to spend or give us peace of mind, all bringing us comfort and happiness. Do you really need that Avocado slicer, that fancy egg timer, that really fancy Fitbit(stop lying to yourself, you aren’t going to start running because of a watch). It’s why people get addicted to shopping, because we all get a slight dopamine rush when we click buy now. But if anything this pandemic has shown us, is that this culture of fast fashion, constant purchasing, none of it matters if we cannot share it with people we love/like/can stand. 

How did I get from looking at a nice rug to modern marketing? I have no idea where I’m going with this, I have literally run out of things to write about. 

“Cause I'm losing my sight

Losing my mind

Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine

Losing my sight

Losing my mind

Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine

Nothing is alright

Nothing is fine

I'm running, and I'm cryin'

I'm cryin', I'm cryin', I'm cryin, I'm cryin” Last resort - Papa Roach 

As if that was released in 2000, it’s been 21 years years since 2000. There are people born in this millennium who are going to be 21 this year. As iffffffff!!!! I used to look at 21 as being the age you are an “Adult”. I cried on my 21st birthday. For some reason my reaction to our Guernsey friends surprising me and my other friend at university for our birthday’s (couple days apart), was to cry. Like, it wasn’t even a slight tearing in the eye. I proper booed it. Having shots at 10am and not getting to the surprise until 8pm may have altered my control over my emotions. But I still look back and think, one of my 1st actions as an “Adult” was to cry. I take comfort that the first thing I did in the morning was to look at one of my friends and say “I forgot you pricks were here”, but rest assured they don’t let me forget the antics of March 21st 2014. It’s only now being an “Adult” in the “Adult” world, do I realise that being an “Adult” isn’t something that actually exists. Nobody really has a clue what is going on or how it’s happening, we just all have faith in an intangible system, that other people know how to do their jobs (they generally don’t) and it works. Other than that we’re all just big kids wanting to play but social rules dictate we can’t. Which is probably why we drink, because it eases our constraints to those social chains and we just get to have fun, climb trees, dance like nobody’s watching and throw cheese at one another. 

“They say the only people who tell the truth are drunkards and children. Guess which one I am.” Stephen Colbert

“Sublime is something you choke on after a shot of tequila.” Mark Z. Danielewski

“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.” JRR Tolkien (Always have to get a Tolkien quote in)

Public Health Pete called yesterday. We’re booked in for our day 13 Covid-19 Test. Almost time to gag on some cotton wool and poke our brains again. Thankfully none of us have developed any symptoms over the past week or so. I had a hell of a headache Sunday morning, but I doubt this was Covid related as it has been replaced by feelings of shame and guilt. We’ve been told to drive to the hospital with our masks on and when we get there we need to follow the rainbows….wait what…can you repeat that Public Health Pete…follow the rainbows. I know there’s been talk of growing Marjuana over here for CBD oils and the such, but I didn’t realise it was in public circulation. Follow the rainbows. Apparently there are rainbows that will guide us to the Covid tent. I think we’re going to be given our tests by the Care Bears. Going to hit us with that Care Bear Stare. 

If you see a white car on Wednesday between 11:30am and 12:30pm with 5 people with masks on, don’t worry nobody farted. It’s just us on our way to see Zippy at the the Rainbow. It’ll be our first time outside the house since the 7th January, we’ll get to see different parishes. We’ll get to drive by Hedge Veg stands. Guernsey people can be a little too trusting, I mean if I walk down the wrong street in any city or town in England and I will lose a phone or wallet. In Guernsey people literally leave their produce on the side of the road to be sold without supervision, except  for an ominous note saying there is surveillance. They’re  called hedge veg, and people are trusted to put their money into a box, often an empty Walls ice cream tub and take the right amount of veg for what they paid for. Imagine doing that in England, you'd lose the lot. You'd even lose the shrubbery in some places. Regardless of surveillance measures.

I hoped you enjoyed today’s ramblings, I’ve no idea what any of it meant, this is what happens when you just type your inner monologue. You’ve had a tour around my mind, please get out now and do not forget any of your belongings, I don’t want to have to think about your stuff.